Since I started getting back into dating I have had a few invites for coffee. Most of these freaked me out and I found myself frantically thinking of excuses why I could not go. I started wondering if I really was being difficult and too fussy. That I didn’t really know what I wanted. To be fair one of the guys wanting to get together only wants sex. One of the other guys when asked about a potential girlfriend said she “just needs to be a swtypie”. I’m not sure I see myself as “just a swtypie”.
With one of the others I was not really sure of him from the start but I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt. He was very quick to ask to move to WhatsApp and I explained why I was not keen (really must investigate the burner app option). He then tried to convince me to change his mind. I felt like there an underlying tone of: my view is superior to yours so you should do what I want. This was not helped by the fact that when I mentioned that I had been in a long distance relationship his response was that long distance relationships never work. With no other information I felt this was a rather arrogant and thoughtless statement. So when he asked a second time for my number I decided to ignore him. I thought for a while that was it, but then he reappeared a day later. He was keen to meet for coffee. I suggested we get to know each other better first. This ended up being me asking him a series of questions because he was not able to turn this into an interesting conversation. Then finally on Sunday he mentioned that he had been to church. I’m willing to respect other people’s views and I want someone who will respect my religious choices. So asked how important church was to him. Vital it seems. He ‘kindly’ offered to discuss my views and I declined.
I was starting to thing I wasn’t really ready to get back into this dating thing. Then on Monday I finally got chatting to a nice guy. He has not yet asked me out for coffee but finally someone I would probably say yes to. He works long hours during the week and is busy during the weekend. Doh, another busy fella. In the meantime I have chatted to a few more guys who seem nice and from whom I would accept a coffee invite. None yet but it is early days.