To WhatsApp or not to WhatsApp?

The question of handing over my WhatsApp details bothered me for a while. WhatsApp does have advantages in that it uses less data and doesn’t kill your battery so fast. Part of the reason I get constant requests but of course this means sharing my phone number.

It feels like all the guys want to use WhatsApp but I find it rather rude when someone says “Hello, can we talk on Whatsapp”.  Sometimes I ask why, so I can understand if there is a good reason, or something less honourable.  One guy sent me a rather nice message saying how he wanted to get to know me better and I hope he does not think it is rude to use Whatsapp.  He seemed friendly so I asked why and after a very brief exchange he told me he did not have time for my questions because he chats a lot.  I thought that was rather rude and decided it was for the best.

There was one guy who was particularly persistent about requesting WhatsApp and to date I have counted 10 requests.  After I ignore his requests he makes some half-hearted attempt at conversation such as “do I prefer tall men or romantic men?”.  This was followed by another request for WhatsApp.  My question is, why would I want to continue chatting elsewhere if you haven’t shown me you can hold a conversation, especially when you insist on calling me “Swty”.  He tried to tell me he was not like other men and that he respects my privacy but after 10 requests I’m not so sure.

After a while I realised that the reason for my reluctance to use WhatsApp is it feels like I am letting strangers into my personal space.  With the app I can log off and forget about online dating.  So it seems to me that anyone who cannot understand or respect my reluctance to share my number is probably someone who will never be able to treat me respect.  So far there is one guy I have connected with on WhatsApp and I’m sure more will follow in time.


9 thoughts on “To WhatsApp or not to WhatsApp?

  1. Why not use a burner phone app for online dating? I use one called Burner (and no, I don’t work for them) and it allows you to get a local number that you can use for texting. That way, you can text with someone but you stay away from having to share any information, and it prevents people from finding you using your phone number. You can delete the number anytime and it allows you to block people.

    I generally trust people but as a single woman, I feel better because I had the same worries as you about sharing my information. Good luck!


    • Thank you for that advice. The app I’m currently using has a good chat function and I find saying no is a good way to test if the guys will respect my boundries.

      But I will look into this option because longer term I think it probably is a good idea


  2. My advice is to use kik as a first choice because it is totally private and you don’t need to share a number. It is also free, fast and good for photo and video messaging. The only drawback is that it uses a lot of battery and storage space but if you’re dating it is totally worth it. I never give out my phone number unless I have met the guy and I feel reasonably sure he won’t violate my privacy or phone rules (eg call me at 2am in a drama or call unannounced).


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